I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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