So drunk its hurt
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Did I show you my penis last night?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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