If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize