we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
