Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
babies were throwing up all over the place
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
