Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
