Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
