"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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