Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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