UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
