You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
