it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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