dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
