She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
