Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
bring money and cleavage
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
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