Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
