I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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