Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
