Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
