It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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