I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
