tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize