do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
You ate ashes out of my bong
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
