Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Is it penis luge time yet?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
