carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
