Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
