it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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