She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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