At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
