Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
if i died would you start the facebook group?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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