were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Even my vagina gasped.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
