My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
