remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
