I'm really into asian looking animals
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
