I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
