In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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