one might say we're banned from that church
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
