im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
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