I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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