Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I would ride that face into the sunset
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
