So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
