Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
