I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
