i jhust puked up my retainher.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
