i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
dude. I can hear the air.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
