all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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