I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize