should my penis look like a turkey
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
