So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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