so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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